I'm sorry I texted you so much during the day assuming you didn't respond because you weren't feeling well not because you had company and weren't able to respond. I hope I didn't cause you any trouble.

I also am sorry I'm selfish and bluntly put, greedy with your time. I want to talk to you all the time and spend every minute possible with you.

It is selfish of me, I know. You make me extremely happy. You're so kind, so loving, and you love me for who I am, exactly as I am, without trying to change me.

And in turn, I want to do everything I can to make sure you are happy, in a healthy way not a distracted way. I covet your time, bluntly put. I feel bad for all the stress I've put you through, and the fact that I've put you in a scenario where you have to make a very difficult decision. I really do my absolute best to talk to you about the situation without bias, but the truth of it is I am extremely bias.

I love you so much, and every part of life is better with you in it.

I'm not sure if this post is an apology or a love letter or both. I hope we're able to chat tomorrow. If you're free, please call me. I at least need to talk about the package I'm sending you briefly.

I'm still optimistic about the future. I love you so very much, Summer.

It's barely been over 24 hours since we've talked on the phone and I miss my best friend, lover, confidant, life partner, encourager, my wisdom...so much! You play so many valuable roles in my life, I owe you a lifetime of gratitude.

I can't write off everything you've done for me.

After our first 9 hour phone call, I loved you for who you were. Every single part of you. There's no "the good outweighs the bad" with you. FIRST, there's so much more good than there is bad. I rarely see the bad, and as we've talked about its because we communicate well and I treat you how you ask to be treated so the bad doesn't surface often. Second, the "bad" isn't bad. The bad is an opportunity for me to love you. Since I actively seek out opportunities to show you all the different ways I love you, when you show me one without my asking I'll rise to that opportunity and love you however the moment calls for.

So even prior to everything you have done for me and continue to do for me, I already wanted to do everything I could for you. Then, you loved me in a way that can't be ignored and I get warm fuzzies just thinking about it.

Sorry if this seemed disorganized or like I'm rambling. I'll blame the ADHD for that.

I love you, in a way that means I am committing to love you for the rest of my life. I love you, and will love Emerson and Audrey just the same. I really look forward to raising two very amazing children with you, my beautiful love.

PS: i really miss you texting and/or calling in the middle of the night.