Im in NC, having a real hard time sleeping, feeling super depressed up here. Its been a bad week at work, i didnt need to come to NC at all, i was reminded how bad my coworkers are, Adam got shitty again because i wouldnt buy him drugs or give him mine, and i went through the whole i dont have any real friends thing again. Ive told you before that i am not sure if pete and I would be friends if we met today. Maybe thats insecurities and thinking im generally unlikable.

But then i remembered you. You talked to me constantly when i provided zero benefit to you. You showed me nothing but love and acceptance. Youve actively fought against me giving you and emerson presents and made it difficult to give you stuff every single time. Even now that youre not allowed to talk to me and getting caught can be life changing, you still make room for me.

I can without any doubt say that you are truly my friend, that you truly love who i am, and that you are not doing it because im useful, or because i spoil you. You met me at rock bottom, but kept talking to me anyway.

I cant describe how good that feels.

Once again, without realizing what you mean to me or what you have done, youre saving my life. Saving me from depression, saving me from myself.

Thank you, so very much.

I love you, beautiful